Dear person behind the blogger,
I am not criticizing you very much. Not because I am afraid of you. I am not worried that you would desert me, and would put on another image. Because, I know, now your online reputation is based completely on my image. You and I have become inseparable ones. Now there is no you, or no me. Only an admixture of us is present. Neither of us can survive in this virtual world without the mutual support. I know this fact and I also know that you too are completely aware of this.
This letter might look a little awkward since the addressee and the author are seemingly the same person. You have been present in this virtual communication space for a long time. You have written over a hundred posts, of which some are found by me also as readable ones, and I don’t hide the truth that I do take time to read some of your posts over and over again simply for the reading cathartic pleasure.
I can understand that sometimes you feel very dry without having any genuine topics to write upon. I know that hurts a lot. But, the way you pick incidents from the dust-coated folder of memories in your brain, and polish them with your pseudo perfectionist’s touch is appreciable. Some of those memories are nice to read, especially the child hood stories, and your memories on certain girls, and the way you narrate your desire to have them as your girl friends. But frankly, some of such memories and the narratives on them are really ugly. I hope at least from now onwards, you would give more dedication to sorting those memories in order to pick the correct one for this blog.
But, I have some questions to you. I know who you are! But tell me who am I? Am I just your Doppleganger, the ghostly double? Or just a dummy for you to show off? You always use me to glorify yourself. You create an image that is me; you call it Tomz in a narcissistic way, and write hiding behind the safe shades of that image. You remember, there are so many persons who expressed disbelief on the revelation of you as the blogger behind this blog. To cite an example, didn’t that girl once tell you that you don’t look like a blogger? Another one who knew you personally also had exhibited her helplessness on identifying you with the writer as presented in this blog. Could she have taken you and me as two distinct persons? She pleaded, didn’t she?
There are some more close friends you have, who have expressed their irritation over your habit of scrutinizing everything around for topics. You don’t know how much irritating and nauseating is that for others. They say something very personal to you, and the next day it becomes a post in your blog with your valor playing as the background theme. How cunningly you establish yourself as a humble and simple guy gaining applauds from all of your sincere and innocent readers? And you have a great explanation for your self-devotion – that your blog’s name explains it all, that you have explained it in the sub heading, and that you are maintaining a boastful blog. How irksome is that? You should understand that your self-glorification through the blog only will bring head ache. You don’t know you are actually itching your close ones and your trust worthy friends.
I also know some of your fraudulence. You often use your blog against those who criticize you in real life. I am not citing any example, or posting the links in which you did that. Though apparently you might not tarnish someone openly, but some of your tricky words are hurting to the real persons whom you have presented as characters in your posts. You are doing it purposefully, though you pretend that you did not do anything wrong. But I know, you are doing it intentionally to hurt them, sometimes with the comic portrayal of them, and some other times by rejecting them soullessly. And those who support you are well portrayed with a bright halo around their heads. I don’t have a better phrase than 'virtual nepotism’ to name your attitude.
I am not criticizing you very much. Not because I am afraid of you. I am not worried that you would desert me, and would put on another image. Because, I know, now your online reputation is based completely on my image. You and I have become inseparable ones. Now there is no you, or no me. Only an admixture of us is present. Neither of us can survive in this virtual world without the mutual support. I know this fact and I also know that you too are completely aware of this.
We both know that we are the same. So I don’t think I would do emotional vomiting here more on this issue. I hope I will see a better you from the next post onwards, so that you can breathe freedom on losing your image. If you present the real you through me, you might not get so many frowns from your friends, and you will never need to face the 'you a blogger? ’ kind of questioning stares any more.
Sincerely yours,
Tomz
This post is part of the contest A letter to yourself.. on WriteUpCafe.com
An interesting take on yourself
ReplyDeleteHello Wesley..welcome to my blog..Thanks for the comment..
DeleteDon't be so hard on yourself, Tomz. Blogging shouldn't become self-flogging. It is scary sometimes, though, to think of a blog as a sort of Picture of Dorian Gray. Will it gradually become hideous for us to look at as we seem to grow more beautiful and wise? Just kidding! I hope you win the contest. You've done a great job with this post.
ReplyDeleteHello Walk2Write,
DeleteI was not just flogging myself. Though without my knowledge, I have got a different image in the blogosphere. But truly, I didnt do it purposefully..
Thanak You
Although we see the letter mainly through the lens of Tom's opinions about himself, but it also makes us dip into our minds here and there as bloggers...and everything looks so hideous!OMG...
ReplyDeleteHope you win....for our sake:)))
Awesome...hilarious!
Hi Panchali,
DeleteHahaha..your observation is correct to a certain extend, that it is the opinion of me about myself. But it is actually opinions about some of my acquaintances who knew me in real and in blog..The letter writer is the combines manifestation of all those friends with my own consciousness playing in the centre..
First time here! What a post this was- I am in deep revelations of my own blogging self now. Consciously or not, we weave stories about our everyday life and people involved. I don't know if it is right or wrong...
ReplyDeleteHi Akanksha,
DeleteYour visit to my blog is really appreciated.. Thank you for the comment..
That was a lot of introspection and a good read:)
ReplyDeleteThank you Rahulji..:)
Deletenicely penned!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Vishnu..welcome to my blog..do visit soon..
DeleteOk. This makes me feel like writing a letter to myself! :-) Wonder how I would start it though! I have been accused of having a dual personality too at times. Hmm.... sounds mental... Split personality and all. But the truth is, the online world is only a part of who we really are. Which part it is, is what makes all the difference. :-) Nicely written Tomz. :-) All the best.
ReplyDeleteHello Jyothi,
DeleteI will appreciate you if you also write a letter to urself..I think this dual personality is common in many of the bloggers..
Thank you fr the wishes..:)
Goon writing tom. Such introspect is good for everyone.
ReplyDeleteBest wishes for the contest!
Ok..but I hope what u meant was good writing and not goon writing ;)
DeleteThanks for the wishes..:-)
Hmm right so let me wait for the Reply from the OTHER MAN :)
ReplyDeletebut good to soemetime have a view on oneself ..
Bikram's
Hmm..The other man has no reason to speak out..Because what is told in this letter are correct..he cant deny those facts..:-)
DeleteInteresting introspection about yourself as a person and as a blogger. Really something worth writing a letter to oneself about.
ReplyDeleteTF,
DeleteWelcome to my blog..Yes..thats right..Thanks for the wishes..:-)
First time here and I enjoyed myself, Tom! Initially, I felt this was quite narcissistic but then the real thought started coming into picture.
ReplyDeleteNice write! :)
Hello Vaishali,
DeleteWelcome to my blog..Want to see u here more often..Happy to give u something enjoyable..
Thank you very much